Breaking The Habit
by connora
Summary: This story is based on Linkin Park's 'Breaking The Habit' and is about how Draco learns to cope with the demons of his life and overcome the path he's been lead down. I hope you like it!


Breaking The Habit  
  
Memories Consume  
  
Like opening the wound  
  
I'm picking me apart again  
  
You all assume  
  
I'm safe here in my room   
  
[Unless I try to start again]  
  
Draco Malfoy sat on the edge of his bed in his bedroom, asking himself why he always agreed with his father when he knew he was wrong. Why he always told his father he was right. Was it to resist himself from another hit from his father? Was it because he had no other choice? Or did he, deep down, really agree? No, he only agreed on the surface. When inside, he was screaming to be released from a life of pain and lies.  
  
Pre - Chorus  
  
I don't want to be the one  
  
The battles always chose  
  
Cause inside I realize  
  
That I'm the one confused  
  
Lucius was always telling Draco what to think and why he should or shouldn't like him or her. He was sick of always being put on the spot. Always put between a rock and a hard place. But was it his father's fault? For filling Draco's head with ruthless things? Yes, but just the same, Draco's for not stopping him, and believing this is what he wanted for so long. He only want along with it so the head of the cane wouldn't strike him.  
  
Chorus:  
  
I don't know what's worth fighting for  
  
Or why I have to scream  
  
I don't know why I instigate  
  
And say what I don't mean  
  
I don't know how I got this way  
  
I know it's not alright  
  
So I'm breaking the habit  
  
Breaking the habit  
  
Tonight  
  
Yes Father,' he would say when he desperately wanted to run away. Draco stood up and looked outside. He saw people so happy with life. Doing what they wanted. But Draco couldn't, He had to follow the Dark Lord. He knew it was wrong but he couldn't help it. If he refused, he mind as well dig his own grave.  
  
"Draco!" his father called.  
  
Draco didn't answer.  
  
"Draco! Come down here! We have guests,"  
  
Still, Draco refused to give his father any indication that he may care.  
  
"Don't make me come up there!" Draco could hear the footsteps coming up the stairs, "Draco,"  
  
Draco walked over to the door and looked it taking a deep breath. Hearing his fathers voice reminded him of when his father talked about what a failure Draco was. the boy needs to be taught,' he'd say, that if you want the better things in life, you have to make sacrifices. Sometimes you have to rule out others. Seems another beating ought to do it.' Draco let out a sigh, holding his chest for fear he might collapse at his father's words.  
  
Clutching my cure  
  
I tightly lock the door  
  
I try to catch my breath again  
  
I hurt much more   
  
Then anytime before  
  
I had no options left again  
  
Draco's father beat on the door.  
  
"Let me in Draco! Open the damn door!"   
  
Draco refuses to let him in. He leaned against the door and slide to the floor. He's head falling forward. Why did he always do what he didn't want to? Why couldn't he just say no to him? Why did he tell lies about how he felt?   
  
"Draco! Let me in!" his father yelled almost beating the door down, "Open it, now!"  
  
Between the beating on the door and yelled, Draco muttered no' several times under his breath until he finally snapped.  
  
Pre - Chorus  
  
Chorus  
  
"No Father! I'm not letting you in!" Draco yelled.  
  
"What?" he father asked stunned.  
  
"You heard me! I'm not opening the door so you and your bloody demons can poison my mind with how I should be like you and follow the Dark Lord! I refuse to listen to what you have to say. I'm not going to sit back and let you take over my life!" Draco yelled.  
  
"Draco, so naive. Doesn't know how powerful you could be. If only-""Stop it Father. Stop. I'm not going to listen to you and you're ideas about how I should be you! I'm not you and I refuses to let you think that!" Draco yelled and kicked the door.  
  
I'll paint it on the walls  
  
Cause I'm the one at fault  
  
I'll never fight again  
  
And this is how it ends  
  
"Father, I'm not going to do what you ask anymore. I'll leave this house if that's what it takes, but I'm not going to be lead down a path where I have to believe that people aren't good enough unless they're a pureblood or rich! I'm not going to let it happen. Over my dead body" Draco yelled once more.  
  
"Draco, this isn't what you want-"  
  
"No! It is what I want! I want to be able to love who I want without you telling me they're not good enough for you! I want to be something. Not a worthless nothing in the eyes of my father. My father! They say you're only as good as you think you are. For the past few years, I've thought nothing of myself because you said I wasn't good enough. But then I was able to see who I truly am. I'm Draco Malfoy. Not Lucius' son. I'm my own person. Not the shadow of a ruthless, hateful, heartless man. My father!" Draco said punching the door causing his hand to bleed. His father stood in utter shock.  
  
I don't know what's worth fighting for  
  
Or why I have to scream  
  
But now I have some clarity  
  
To show you what I mean  
  
I don't know how got this way  
  
I'll never be alright  
  
So I'm breaking the habit  
  
Breaking the habit  
  
Breaking the habit  
  
Tonight 


End file.
